The clarity and precision of fresh snow and blue sky.

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An old post about snow that seems utterly apt after this weekend of snow and then, today, blindingly clear blue skies.

I have been thinking for days about writing a post about snow, and, lo and behold, it’s snowing again!  It’s so great with the universe comes through like that.  Of course, it’s been snowing almost non-stop since December 26th, so possibly it’s a coincidence.  When I look out my office window, whose four panes frame so many hours of my gazing out at the world, it looks like I live in a snow globe.

People always write about the “muffled” quality of snow, about its quiet, the silence it lends to the world.  For me this is absolutely true when it’s snowing.  There is an outside-of-real-life feeling when the sky is mottled with moving white snowflakes.   Maybe it’s a vestige of childhood snow days, maybe it’s the way movement in the outside world is slowed down to a crawl.  Something just floats over me, a gossamer cape of wonder, a reminder to breathe and watch.  The snow globe is a good place to live, insulated from the real world, the rough jolts of life somehow less jarring, muted.

And yet when it’s no longer snowing, but the world is covered with snow, I don’t find it muffled at all.  It’s the opposite: I find it sharp, its clarity in such high definition that sometimes it hurts.  Pam Houston’s words always come to mind: “When everything in your life is uncertain, there’s nothing quite like the clarity and precision of fresh snow and blue sky.”  There’s something wide-awake, hyper-saturated and, as she says, precise, about life with clear skies overhead and snow underfoot.  Emerging from my swaddled time in the snowglobe, everything seems purified, clarified, washed clear by the white everywhere.

Today I knelt on the floor by my office window and watched the flakes fall.  This afternoon they were huge, big clumps of snowflakes dropping out of the pale steel-gray sky.  Watching them, I remembered the passage in Donald Miller’s A Million Miles in a Thousand Years about how “each snowflake bore the scars of its journey.”  I looked up into the sky, straining to see as far as I could.  I thought of another time that I instinctively knelt, when, just like today, “…I have felt a presence that disturbs me with the joy of elevated thoughts; a sense sublime of something far more deeply interfused.”

Another thing about snow: it is practically impossible (at least for a hack like me) to take pictures that capture the falling snow.  Hello, metaphor.  You just have to watch.  Pay attention.  Inscribe it on the vellum of memory.  What you see is what you get.

Originally written January 19, 2011, during another season of snow.

Only now

And so you have a life that you are living only now, now and now and now, gone before you can speak of it, and you must be thankful for living day by day, moment by moment … a life in the breath and pulse and living light of the present…
~Wendell Berry

Another beautiful quote from Barnstorming.

More things I love lately

I am hardly the first to note the amazing site The Reconstructionists, but I just love it, so I’ll add my voice to the choir.  The site is a “yearlong celebration of women who changed how we see the world,” and pairs portraits of the famous women with their quotations and some biographical information.  Amazing.

Christina Rosaline on turning 35, which she recognizes as the someday of life.  “This, this is my beautiful, reckless, heartbreaking, perfect life.”  I read this beautiful post in tears.

Meeting Priscilla Warner this weekend, which was an enormous treat and complete joy.  Priscilla is every bit as warm and wise and funny as I knew she would be.  I could have sat and talked to her for hours and hours.  If you haven’t read Learning to Breathe yet, you should.

Maya Stein’s visceral, gorgeous poetry.  My favorite lines of hers remain these, below, but every single poem stops me in my tracks by making me both think and feel.

“The world spins as it spins.
Your life is on that same axis,
half shadow, half radiance
and turning, always turning.”

Finally, my piece about what I view as an essential question: Is my constant sense of failing to be present getting in the way of my actually being present? is on the Huffington Post this week.  If you haven’t seen it, I would welcome your thoughts there!

What are you reading, thinking about, and loving lately?

Photo Wednesday 31

hockey

Sunday morning, 7am.  I was openly skeptical of the decision for Whit to play hockey, quite critical of the schedule (6am games on Sundays?) and demands, and basically not into the idea at all.  I never thought I’d say this, then: I am so glad my son plays hockey.  I even like the early morning games.  On the Sundays that I take him, it’s just us, alone in the world, munching a toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwich as we drive through the rising dawn.  I love it.