Month: November 2008

Hilary called to report that Hannah was playing with two stuffed animals and named them (completely of her own accord) Sasha and Malia.

I love it.

We are moving towards the solstice, and there is still so much here that I do not understand.

This day opened with a rare moment of sibling closeness. Grace and Whit curled up in her bed and she showed him how to play with her leapster. The lack of screaming was deafening and a delight!
Then Gracie and I biked to school, and I came home and went to Starbucks (a major problem with biking is how hard it is to transport a coffee cup). Then I went into Boston for an errand and then to lunch at the Liberty Hotel with Planned Parenthood. The presentation over lunch, which focused on PPLM’s middle school education program, was inspirational and terrifying in equal measure.
I picked Grace up at school (Wednesdays are early days, with 2pm dismissal) and we met Hayden and Heather at Lanes & Games on route 2 for some bowling. The place is super old-school and the children had a ball; you can see Grace having a blast below, complete with oreo cookie hanging out of her mouth.
And now home with the kids bathed and watching Tom & Jerry while I enjoy a big glass of sauv on the rocks. Not a bad day!

Today we finally biked to school; Grace has wanted to do this for ages and there has always been a reason not to (it’s raining, need to take Whit to school too across Cambridge, I have to go to Providence from BB&N, etc). Today, we did it. It was 25 degrees. My usual impeccable timing on display.

I had lunch with Natalie today, and she got me thinking about raising boys. This mulling led me to finally crack open a book that Elizabeth Newman suggested months ago. I only read about 30 pages of It’s a Boy! but I am already choking back tears. The introduction cites four things you should do to effectively parent your boy (though these are obviously true, with different nuances, for a girl):

1. Accept the reality that boys are different from girls
2. Love the end product of boyhood, namely, a man
3. Appreciate your child’s uniqueness (individuality trumps gender)
4. Surrender your expectations of “making a man” of your boy

In the section about (2) Thompson talks about imagining the man your child will become and I instantly felt that hollow pressure in my chest and prickling in my eyes. I don’t even have words for these thoughts which bubble up whenever I think in a big picture way about My Children and Parenting. My God, is there a deep and turbulent sea of emotion just under the surface when it comes to Grace and Whit. Beneath my wild oscillations from joking playmate to screaming harpy to patient listener to short-and-snappy critic … well, underneath that motley mix of moods and personalities are depths of feeling that I simply don’t know yet how to put into words.

I think I’ll return to my King memoir now, feeling a little drained and distracted. Perhaps I will start with Elle magazine, actually.