I really, really, really love Dr. Rick. We had a great appointment today, Grace checked out as average size (45.5 inches, 50%, and 43 pounds, 40%) and all seems well. He is magic with her; he addressed all of his questions to her and she was open and responsive. Also did a sight check and that is 20/20.
We spent most of the time talking about school and social emotional things. Grace averred that she likes to play alone, which was fine, until her lip started trembling a little bit and she confessed that she doesn’t feel like a lot of the other kids want to play with her. This is consistent with what the teachers said in her conference and I confess it surprised me. To enjoy being alone is a wonderful thing, and a gift I hope I’ve given her. To feel left out and excluded is, of course, not. There was an episode on the playground last week that has me a bit worried about the peer pressure in the class. In combination with her description of the other kids being “real friends” with each other but not with her, I’m feeling ambivalent about her school for the first time.
Talking to Rick was helpful. His is, as usual, a wonderfully calm, moderate voice of wisdom. He did ask that I keep tabs on the anxiety Grace is exhibiting though. I feel such an aching familiarity with her concerns and behavior. She so clearly wants people to like her, wants her peers to want to be her friend; I worry that this can become corrosive and can lead to losing touch with her very own self (as she used to say as a toddler: “I want to do it my very own self!“).
Nothing to do but watch and wait, and keep telling her that she is great just by being her very own self.