I vaguely recall a dumb TV show about kids saying the darndest (is that even a word?) things. I’ve been thinking lately that actually parenting makes you say things randomer than you ever imagined. I have one example and heard another from Brooke today. Please share the strange sentences you’ve uttered to your progeny in comments. (I just like that elephant, and the pillow on its back suggests a kind of elephants-flying-while-being-ridden absurdity that echoes the kinds of statements I’m thinking of)

me: “Whit, please stop poking me in the back of the neck with that shower head.”

Brooke: “If you put your pants on, I’ll bring the pirate downstairs.”