Things I Love

I miss you guys!  Popping in to share a few things that I’m reading and loving lately, and would love to hear from you.

Above: my favorite flowers, on our kitchen table.

The Farm – Wow.  I’m really loving this novel, written by a woman I went to college with.  It’s fascinating, entertaining, and thought-provoking all at once.  Highly recommend.

Attention is the Beginning of Devotion – I adore this Atlantic piece about Mary Oliver’s poetry, which exhorts the reader, almost above all else, to pay attention and to notice. These are themes that recur in my life, and it won’t surprise anyone that Oliver is my favorite poet.

The Difference Between Happiness and Joy – This David Brooks oped in the New York Times moved me.  Just, yes.  Magic.  A blaze of joy.  In this liminal season of commencements, awareness of our good fortune and of the farewells that fill our lives are heightened, and I experience the vulnerability that Brooks cites.

Forties Stories – I’ve been listening to more podcasts lately, when I run in the mornings (which I do only when it’s light out, don’t worry) and when I drive.  I found Christy Maguire’s wonderful podcast through my friend Nina Badzin and am so grateful for what she’s doing.

What are you reading, listening to, thinking about, and loving lately?

How to Raise a Feminist Son – This New York Times piece is not new, but I’m glad I came across it again this weekend.  I still agree (deeply, almost violently) with the points it makes. For years I’ve responded to well-meaning comments about being, as a working mother, a role model for my daughter, by saying “and for my son!”  I wrote about the importance of talking about the Brett Kavanaugh hearings with both our daughters and our sons.  I love the Gloria Steinem quote the article shares: “I’m glad we’ve begun to raise our daughters more like our sons, but it will never work until we raise our sons more like our daughters.” That’s how it works at our house.  At least that’s what we’re trying for. Amen.

Carrying the Ghosts of Lives Unlived – “We all have hinge points in our lives, jobs taken or not taken, relationships ended or begun. We’re all living our regular lives, where our choices and actions have real consequences. But sometimes we carry in our minds the ghosts of other lives we might have had.”  Indeed.  Don’t you know this feeling, of once in a while thinking about that other, alternative life, full of its own glories and pains?

The 23 Most Unforgettable Last Sentences in Fiction – Ron Charles’ beautiful list includes some of my favorites, too (which I wrote about here, and which serve as a counterpoint of sorts to my fascination with the dedications in books). Just beautiful.  My favorite, I think, is the last sentence of Beloved.

Brandless – I stumbled upon this site and have ordered twice now, some kitchen staples, a few cleaning products.  I love what they stand for and love the simplicity of their aesthetic, too.  Highly recommend.

I write these Things I Love posts approximately monthly.  You can find them all here.

Dani Shapiro: By the Book: My favorite writer.  My favorite column.  Not sure I need to say much more.

The Gifts of Inheritance: Dani Shapiro and Me: I loved Zibby Owens’ Medium article about her relationship with both Dani’s writing and Dani in person.  Dani’s writing has been a beacon and an inspiration to me for years, and I was fortunate to spend a couple of years in her private workshop as well.  Her influence on me has been enormous, and I loved reading about Zibby’s experience.

Inheritance: A Memoir of Genealogy, Paternity, and Love: Since this is the Dani Shapiro edition of Things I Love Lately, her newest book, which I loved, is on sale today!  Buy and read and give to many friends!  I know I am.

Broken Harts:  I’m basically learning my way around the podcast world (I listened to Serial and loved it, and have listened to many OnBeing episodes, but that’s it) but I am absolutely riveted by Broken Harts. This series tells the tragic story of the Hart family, whose two mothers and six adopted children went over a cliff in California last March.  The sad, complicated story is sensitively told and I highly recommend it.

Brownie roll-out cookies: I’m a diehard chocolate chip cookie person and generally don’t bother making anything else.  On Sunday for some reason I was compelled to try these and oh, I am glad I did!!  I made them with a small heart cookie cutter (see photo above) and YUM.  Would be great with vanilla ice cream and chocolate sauce.  These are going on repeat.

I write these Things I Love posts approximately monthly. You can find them all here.

Uniqlo long underwear – In the winter I’m always cold.  There are two major places that I experience this, and I have finally fixed one!  I bought several long-underwear shirts by Uniqlo that are thin and soft and comfortable, and I wear them under sweaters.  Huge improvement.  Next stop: my feet.  Any suggestions?

A Mother’s Wish for Down Under – I read Lee Wooduff’s piece with tears literally pouring down my cheeks. “But I got what I asked for. His leave-taking, his curiosity about the greater world was my job. He is doing exactly what I raised him to do – to go pursue his own life.”  Yes.  Yes, yes, and yes.  I’m on the doorstep of some of this leave-taking, and wow, it’s beautiful and painful in equal measure.

Holiday Book Suggestions – I shared this list of the books I am buying for the holidays this year last week, but am sharing it again in case it got lost in the Thanksgiving shuffle.

Exit West– I read Mohsin Hamid’s book over Thanksgiving on Grace’s recommendation and wow.  It took me a little while to get into it, but once I did, I was awestruck by Hamid’s beautiful prose, by his observations, both lyrical and brutal, on being an immigrant, on the fluidity of the world’s population.  It feels incredibly, prophetically germane to this exact moment, too.

Homecoming – I watched the first season of this Amazon series, starting Julia Roberts, a few weeks ago.  It’s hypnotically interesting, full of confusing time jumps and wonderful acting performances, and as my sister and I recently discussed, the 30 minute format is just great.  I highly recommend it.

I write these Things I Love posts approximately monthly.  You can see them all here.

So, hey!  I updated my profile photo here!  Finally.  The old one was from October 2007.  So it was time.  This picture was taken last year.  Ten years older, no question about that, but it’s real.

She Roars – I love this piece by my friend and classmate, Allison Slater Tate, about what it meant to her to return to the campus of our alma mater for the recent conference celebrating female alumnae, She Roars.  Every word of her piece resonates with me, from her sense of being about to breathe “with both lungs” to her fear that the second half of life will be “highlighted by loss.”

For Fathers of Daughters – This post (which I personally think is a must-read for fathers of daughters and sons) made me cry.  Yes, yes, and yes.  There is so much good advice here, from the concrete and tangible to the large and abstract, as think about raising empowered, brave, and strong daughters.  This last one: talk about this stuff with boys and other men. YES.  It’s crucial to have these conversations, around our dinner tables and conference tables, with people we parent, people we love, people we work with, and people we have just met.

A Handbook for Grieving – This piece by Caroline Grant absolutely took my breath away.  While my experience of a parent’s death was different, this piece pulses with relatability, pain, and beauty.  I read it through tears.  Everyone needs to read this.

Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup, John Carreyrou – I found this nonfiction story of Theranos’ rise and fall unputdownable.  Fascinating.  So much outright deception!  Wow.

What are you reading, thinking about, and loving lately?  Please tell me!

I write these Things I Love posts approximately monthly.  You can find them all here.