Whit right now

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Almost daily I wish desperately that I could freeze my children into in amber.  I want to remember exactly who and how they are right now.

Lately Whit is slaying me with adorableness and hilarity. There’s his under-his-breath proclamation that someone is a “tionary,” or his loud, from the back seat question while we sit in traffic, “Which donkey hole isn’t moving?”

Things I love about Whit right now, May 2013:

The other day, as we drove to school, Whit exclaimed “look at that!” from the backseat.   I glanced back to see that he was pointing out a newly blooming patch of daffodils along a fence.  “So pretty, ” he sighed.  May my son always notice things around him, including the flowers.

Last Sunday, at family dinner, Matt announced his idea that each of us pick something that’s hard for us to do that week.  He was going to go for a long run, Whit was going to eat his whole lunch, etc.  Matt’s suggestion for me was that I introduce myself to two new people at baseball practice.  I must have blanched, because Whit reached over and patted my hand.  “I’ll help you.  I’m not shy,” he said, smiling at me.  And he did.

Over the weekend I was trying to recruit a child to come with me to the grocery store.  They were reluctant.  “I’ll let you pick out flowers for your room!” I tried.  Whit was instantly in.  He loves having fresh flowers in a vase in his room.  This may be connected to #1.

Whit’s loyalty to me knows no bounds, and is often completely without logic.  He will stand up for me whatever the situation, back me no matter what, even when there’s no reason to.  The weekend I was away for work recently Matt called me, aghast at how Whit always, no matter what, defended me (what were they talking about that this was notable, I wondered?).  He presumed I had put Whit up to this, but I had not.  I know I won’t always be his favorite person, but right now I suspect I am.

A couple of months ago we were at someone’s house and the kids had vanilla ice cream.  I did not know if the chocolate sauce was safe for Whit (he is allergic to nuts) and I told him that.  I expected him to be upset and instead he shrugged his shoulders, resigned.  A moment later he asked if he could put maple syrup on his ice cream.  “How very Canadian of you, Whit,” someone noted.  I was impressed with both his understanding of why he couldn’t have what the other kids were having and his resourcefulness in coming up with another idea.

Recently, Whit bemoaned the fact that the magnolias were all gone, already.  “It’s so fast, Mummy,” he said morosely, and I had to swallow before agreeing.  But then he bounced back, announcing that “so many exciting things are happening right now!”  I asked him what he meant.  He explained that the trees were all in bloom, the chicks at school had hatched, and the chrysalises they had been following were all beginning to crack and butterflies were imminent.  My little naturalist.  My little noticer.

I can’t stop time, that much I know, but I can do my best to pay attention and to capture its minutes as they fly by.

28 thoughts on “Whit right now”

  1. What a wonderful idea. I think I am going to have to try the flowers in your room bribe- never thought of it and my girls would both love it- Katherine especially.

  2. What a sweet portrait of your boy. Grace, too, is a naturalist and a noticer, and it brings me such profound joy when I see her tending to her flowers, identifying by name the birds in our backyard. Like you, I hope this is something she holds onto forever.

  3. How I love this post as I wait for my boy to arrive (due in October!) I hope he will be as fiercely loyal to his mom as Whit is to you! xxxx

  4. Oh Lindsey you are killing me with this. Little boys are so wonderful. Super tough and super sweet. I too am loving being a favorite now too. May we always be their number ones!!!

  5. Oh, I love this. You’ve inspired me to do this with my own kids. I so get everything you say about the bittersweet—the juxtaposition of joy and melancholy when you notice how perfect it is and how it simply cannot last. As the mother of tiny boys, I also appreciate reading about the wonder of older boys. I have no experience there and it scares me sometimes!

  6. Just last week, I looked across the table at my gangly boy with the deep voice and the shadow of hair across his upper lip, and I so longed for the sweet little boy who used to sit there. (The one who could fall off his chair while sitting at dinner. How? I don’t really know.) It’s not that I don’t adore the boy I have now (although I wish he adored me as much as the one who is gone). I do. But I wish I could have held the one who used to cling to my neck just a little bit longer.

  7. I just found your blog through a friend a week ago and I am still a fairly new mom to two boys under 3…your words capture so much of what I feel. Thank you for writing.

  8. Look at that sly little smile…
    I love how you write about the wondrous and bittersweet parts of parenting.
    Oh, and I love little boy voices. My son is two and just learning to express his “voice” in short sentences. He’ll say something so seriously and so earnestly, but it’s in the sweet little boy voice that melts my heart.

  11. I wish I knew how to guard this quality and predilection, how to protect from the world of tweens and teens that I’m pretty sure may not value it the way I do. xox

  14. I know what you mean. I need to write about the fears I had and still have about a BOY … I’m one of two girls, I had a daughter first, I felt totally nervous about it – and I still am! But so far, so good … xoxo

  15. Oh, I know – this is piercing. I know just what you mean. I miss mine already and he is STILL HERE. xox

  17. Sly is the perfect word for it!!! For me, at least, it wouldn’t be half as wonderful if it weren’t for the bittersweet. xox

  21. Thanks for another delightful post.

    I’m curious.

    What type of flower did Whit choose when he accompanied you to the market, and did he give a reason for his choice?

  23. I love Whit and I’ve never met him! I would have died laughing to hear “donkey hole” live! But I really love is that he is so aware of what is around him. And that comes from you, Mummy. Such a sweet, sweet boy.

  24. Oh Whit, always so kind and sweet. I have so many fond memories of him making laugh, smile or both. I love that he still gives me a hug when I pass by on the playground. I am enjoying your writing . . . Makes me smile and reflect on my own parenting too. Thanks 🙂

  25. Oh, Rachel! I’m so thrilled and honored to know you’re reading. As you know he is not without his challenges too (he can be a donkeyhole himself!), but I do love his moments of sweetness and hilarity. xox

  26. Thank you, Hallie! He can be a donkeyhole, too … but most of the time he’s pretty great. I imagine most kids are like that! 🙂 xox

  27. Gosh, I loved this. I was so nervous when we found out that the twins I was carrying were both boys. Nervous is an understatement really. But now that they’re here and beginning to blossom into their own personalities, I’m just beginning to experience all the nuances of tough and sweet in these boys. The part about Whit always having your back made me laugh because I can see clearly that Luke is going to be my little sidekick but Wyatt sometimes chooses my husband over me and I find myself thinking, What am I doing wrong and how can I fix this? 🙂 Which I realize is very silly and petty of me but I can’t help it.

  28. I didn’t find out the gender of my children either time, but when Whit was born I definitely had a moment (or more than one) of panic that I had a boy … but now of course I would never, ever choose for it to be otherwise. xox

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